Doctor Who's Putrid Ham
A quest through the Dr Who novelisations
"The excellent ham of Doctor Who is more than a little off"
1974 Times Literary Supplement review of Doctor Who and the Crusaders (quoted from David J Howe's The Target Book)
"A booby-trap—and you were the booby, Jaeger"
DOCTOR WHO AND THE MUTANTS
by Terrance Dicks
First published 29 September 1977 (1), between Horror of Fang Rock and The Invisible Enemy (2)
Tat Wood (and probably Lawrence Miles) assesses ‘The Mutants’ as in at least some way addressing or echoing US-style segregation, apartheid in South Africa, terrorist movements seeking political concessions, the British empire in India, the British empire in Kenya, the return of British empire personnel to the UK, the marginalisation of the Welsh language, Tarkovsky’s Solaris and Kafka’s ‘Metamorphosis’ (3). El Sandifer throws in Nazi rocket scientists on top of all that (4) and asserts that the massive ‘excess of reference points’, contrary to what Wood might feel, easily all ‘exist in the same general orbit’ (5).
To be fair on Wood, one of the reasons Sandifer disagrees with his verdict is that her list of reference points – the dissolution of the British empire, segregation in the US, the start of apartheid in South Africa and ex-Nazi rocket scientists – is rather less excessive than his and all belong to the late-1940s and the 1950s. Of course they all fit together – they did in the real world. Anyway, the advantage of her approach is that Baker and Martin’s critique of empire, which boils down to ‘get out’, manages to embrace all of ‘white western European culture’ (6).
However, pleasingly unambiguous as that message may be, it also runs the risk of suggesting that when the Europeans did get out in the second half of the 20th century, that was them coming good. ‘The Mutants’ hints at the lack of benevolence behind imperial withdrawal, the Administrator insisting independence will come ‘Whether they’re ready for it or not’ (7), but unfortunately does it in a way that tacitly supports colonialism, as if it’s a process that genuinely takes underdeveloped countries and, if done properly, eventually turns them into ones able to stand on their own two feet. Doctor Who and the Mutants, thankfully, has the Administrator also point out that the Solonians had managed perfectly well before humanity’s arrival and add the detail that Earth is giving Solos independence ‘Not for their sakes—for ours!’ (8). The empire just turns up, strips all the wealth out of the planet (9) and then buggers off when there’s not enough in it for them any more (10).
This nicely sets up a tension between what Baker and Martin as writers and Terrance Dicks as script editor wanted to do with the story, which, according to Shannon Sullivan, dated right back to commissioning – the former were primarily inspired by ‘concerns about South Africa’s segregationist Apartheid policy’ (11) while the latter was interested in addressing ‘the British Empire’s nineteenth-century colonialist ways’ (12). Both (or all three) seem to have felt that the two were easily analogous but seem to have differed on the most useful purpose to which to put the observation.
A clue to what Dicks is targeting comes in the way Jaeger, an addition to the broadcast episodes for which Sullivan suggests Dicks was partially responsible in the first place (13), is not quite the same in the novelisation as onscreen. The name might remain evocative and rockets might still be his tool of choice but without the performance, by which I of course mean the accent, it’s more of a stretch to read him specifically as an ex-Nazi rocket scientist, of the type the UK, US and USSR were all so keen to grab after the Second World War, especially once there’s a back-story thrown in (14). Instead, thanks to Dicks tweaking a few lines, like having the Marshal insist the Mutts must be ‘Exterminated!’ (15), he’s more like a scientist working under the Nazi regime. That’s pretty much a statement that the British empire were the Nazis of their day.
Where Baker and Martin were using their reference points to implicate all of white western culture in the problems experienced by indigenous populations around the world, Dicks is using them specifically to emphasise how bad the British empire was. If something resembles Nazi Germany, it’s hard to argue it’s a good thing; if something resembles apartheid South Africa, by, say, trying to make the native population aliens to their own land (16), it’s hard to argue it’s a good thing. Dicks may offer less excess than Baker and Martin – transmat segregation is out the window, for example (17) – but there’s, oddly, a more direct challenge to his assumed audience than there was in the TV episodes.
That extends to the novelisation’s reflections on who is culpable for the acts committed in the name of empire. Though the Marshal is still clearly a ‘brute and a bully’ with, wonderfully, ‘the temper of a rogue elephant’ (18), he’s also made a literal and figurative product of the colonial system. He’s worked his way up over ‘many years’ from ‘a lowly security guard’ to his current position of ‘supreme power on Solos’ (19) and, though he still spends the story ruthlessly trying to maintain his position, regardless of the cost to the Solonians, rather than be decommissioned to a lesser ‘clerical’ role (20), his chosen path is a reaction to the clear contempt in which he’s held by the likes of the Administrator (21) and to the fact that his demotion has as much to do with his lack of ‘powerful friends or academic qualifications’ (22) as it does the oncoming redundancy of his role (23).
The important thing is that, despite the Marshal never being anything other than the villain of the piece, his behaviour is far from aberrant – he’s not some loose cannon who just happened to come to a position of authority within the empire. Just as the Marshal has his ‘gorillas’ (24), so the likes of the Administrator and the Investigator have the Marshal to conduct the brutal nitty-gritty of ‘dominating […] lesser planets’ (25). This can be seen in the speed with which the Investigator adopts the Marshal as a ‘shield’ the moment he’s actually confronted by the events on Solos, seemingly equating ‘brutality’ with hands-on ‘experience’ (26), and in how closely the Marshal’s reaction to the Doctor (27), simply refusing to engage with anything new or different, mirrors the Investigator’s to the Mutt and the Administrator’s, so the Doctor suspects, to everything (28). The Marshal is a villain because that’s what the empire requires of its cogs and everyone complicit in imperialism shoulders some of the responsibility. You don’t get excused just for staying at home if you still reap some of the benefits.
Dicksisms
Ky with Jo: ‘He heaved her up, slung her over one brawny shoulder, and ran on down the trail’
And I’m sorry to keep bringing it up, but it’s the fact that it’s used multiple times in each book that fascinates me: ‘The TARDIS door swung open of its own accord and a strange wheezing, groaning sound filled the air’ AND ‘A few minutes later there was a wheezing, groaning sound and the police box faded away’
Height Attack
The Doctor is a ‘tall white-haired man in the ruffled shirt and elegant velvet smoking-jacket’, ‘Cotton was a tall lean man’, the Administrator is ‘a tall, grey-haired man’, Sondergaard first appears as a ‘huge, lumbering silvery shape’, Varan is a ‘huge, fierce-looking native’, the Mutts are ‘huge misshapen’ figures and Ky becomes ‘taller and thinner than before’ at the end of his metamorphosis.
The Marshal, though not tall, is possessed of a ‘huge bulk’, a ‘massive bulk’ and is a ‘bulky, unmistakable figure’
Are You Sitting Comfortably..?
‘For once the Doctor was mistaken’
Tory Who
‘Ky looked down at her, and something about the tiny figure stirred his compassion’ – to be fair, I think my issue is that I read Jo as a woman whereas I think Dicks absolutely views her as a child
‘Ironically, Ky and his friends were making so much noise that the Administrator was unable to tell them the one thing they; had waited so long to hear’ – so it’s all their fault?
1 tardis.wikia.com/wiki/Doctor_Who_and_the_Mutants_(novelisation)
3 Tat Wood, About Time 3 (expanded 2nd edition); pp.252,4&6
4 ‘the German rocket scientist OK with exterminating a species and the use of gas specifically to kill the mutants in the cave is blatantly a Nazi reference’
Elizabeth Sandifer, Tardis Eruditorum, eruditorumpress.com/blog/change-my-dear-the-mutants
5 ‘what we have here is an excess of reference points […] Where it all gets very interesting, at least for my money, is in the fact that the ideas, much as they may not go together straightforwardly, do at least exist in the same general orbit’
Elizabeth Sandifer, Tardis Eruditorum, eruditorumpress.com/blog/change-my-dear-the-mutants
6 ‘One thing to note is that the humans have no place whatsoever on Solos. The overwhelming message of the story is that they should simply get out. […] Effectively, it appears that white western European culture has nothing of value whatsoever that it can contribute to the indigenous culture’
Elizabeth Sandifer, Tardis Eruditorum, eruditorumpress.com/blog/change-my-dear-the-mutants
7 MARSHAL: Give them independence, they'll starve out of total incompetence.
ADMINISTRATOR: Nevertheless, they shall have their independence. Whether they're ready for it or not.
chakoteya.net/DoctorWho/9-4.htm
8 ‘“They'll starve to death without Earthmen to look after them.” “Indeed? They managed before we came.” The Administrator's voice hardened. “In any event, Marshal, they shall have their independence, whether they're ready for it or not. Not for their sakes—for ours!”’
9 ‘Thaesium, Doctor. Solos is one of the richest fuel sources in the galaxy. Or rather it used to be. The deposits are exhausted now’
10 There’s even, possibly, a little comment on the types of regime the European empires tended to leave in their wakes, Ky’s TV farewell – KY [OC]: I thank you, Doctor, for all my people. Goodbye. (chakoteya.net/DoctorWho/9-4.htm) – suddenly getting all haughty – ‘Ky thanks you, Doctor’ – and no longer on behalf of the people in the novelisation
11 ‘the colonial oppression of natives on an alien planet, inspired by Martin's concerns about South Africa's segregationist Apartheid policy’
Shannon Sullivan, A Brief History of Time (Travel), shannonsullivan.com/drwho/serials/nnn.html
12 ‘This caught the eye of script editor Terrance Dicks, who wanted to do a story about the British Empire's nineteenth-century colonialist ways’
Shannon Sullivan, A Brief History of Time (Travel), shannonsullivan.com/drwho/serials/nnn.html
13 ‘Dicks and Letts suggested a variety of changes to the storyline for part two, such as the introduction of Jaeger ‘
Shannon Sullivan, A Brief History of Time (Travel), shannonsullivan.com/drwho/serials/nnn.html
14 ‘He was a vain and unprincipled man, desperate for scientific recognition, but without the talent to attain it on his own. A nasty scandal over research results, stolen from a junior colleague, had led to Jaeger's fleeing Earth and entering the Marshal's service. He was filled with excitement at the thought of being known as the man who changed the atmosphere on Solos. The Doctor's part could always be played down in the reports… perhaps forgotten altogether’ – and isn’t that last bit a repeat of Doctor Who and the Claws of Axos? Is this a new Dicks staple?
15 ‘“As for the Mutants, they're a menace. They must be wiped out! Exterminated!” “And that's your alternative to independence— mass murder?”’
MARSHAL: […] The Mutts are a menace and must be wiped out.
ADMINISTRATOR: And that's your alternative to independence? Genocide?
chakoteya.net/DoctorWho/9-4.htm
16 ‘He plans to make our air breathable for humans… not for Solonians’
17 I think… I’m mostly unsure of myself on this because, were I right, surely the wikia page wouldn’t omit that detail while still finding space to observe Dicks changing the wording of Part Five’s cliffhanger
18 ‘A brute and a bully, with the temper of a rogue elephant—a very dangerous man’
19 ‘He had come to Solos many years ago as a lowly security guard. Step by step he had fought his way to the position of Marshal, with supreme power on Solos’
20 ‘don't worry, old chap, we'll find you something. The Bureau of Records, perhaps. Something— clerical?’
21 ‘The Administrator had never really liked the Marshal. In his opinion the fellow was an uncultured oaf, unfit for his high position’
22 ‘Back on crowded, polluted Earth he would be a nobody, one of a crowd of unemployed officials, without powerful friends or academic qualifications to help him’
23 That’s pretty much a call back to the decaying society of Morestra
28 ‘Four particularly thuggish-looking guards marched into the office. Stubbs and Cotton sighed despairingly at the sight of them. These were the Marshal's pet 'gorillas', too stupid to be trusted with any authority, but loyal enough to obey any order, no matter how brutal’
25 ‘He looked at the mural behind it, showing Earth dominating a cluster of lesser planets. The Marshal loved his office. It was the symbol of his power’
26 ‘All the Investigator's calm authority had vanished, shattered by the terrifying appearance of the Mutant and the brutality with which the Marshal had destroyed it. Perhaps such matters were best left to those with the experience to handle them, he thought. Contrasted with the danger of the Mutants, the Marshal's massive form seemed a shield rather than a menace’ – and there’s something appealing about the manner in which, however awful the Marshal is, the sheer ineffectiveness and selfish sheltered cowardice of the Investigator is somehow more despicable
27 ‘The Marshal couldn't make the Doctor out—and what he didn't understand he didn't trust’
28 ''Typical bureaucrat,' thought the Doctor to himself. 'Hates anything to disturb his nice routines''
Miscellania
‘It was a planet of jungles’ – is this a hangover from novelising ‘Planet of Evil’?
‘Jo was relieved to see that their host was at least human’ – that’s twice in two books now
‘It was clear that Ky was a vital part of the Doctor's plans. She felt it was her job to stay with him, whatever the risks’ – is this the only explicit reference to the fact that Jo is actually employed to be the Doctor’s assistant, making her the only side-kick ever to have this strange relationship with him?
‘A booby-trap—and you were the booby, Jaeger’ – ‘Allo ‘Allo!’s come five years early
The Doctor must go to Solos because of ‘The Time Lords' code’, which is ‘like a three-line whip in your Parliament’. That’s… underwhelming
I’ve got nowhere near the same issue with Rick James’s performance as everyone else seems to but ‘Cotton stared and said woodenly’ does feel like Dicks might be taking the piss